October 13, 2014
As I sat down to type this post I became aware of 3 important things that happened 6 months ago on this day:
- I turned 50. So that makes me 50 1/2. That’s what we would say when we were kids. Or, “almost 51.” But today 50 is good enough.
- This is the first blog I have posted. I have been writing, but #3 will explain where most of my attention has gone.
- My daughter’s kidneys failed and she almost died. As a matter of fact, Jaime has beat death 2 1/2 times in the past 6 months.
My 50th started as a great day. My sister and nephew brought me donuts from Duck Donuts. Here in Williamsburg “Duck” is the Mercedes Benz of donuts. Then I was treated to a great lunch with friends and another young lady who shares my birth date. Dinner was on my own because friends were preparing my birthday celebration on Saturday evening.
I was about ready to settle in for the evening when I got the call. “Momma I need to go to the ER!”
I won’t go into all the details here, but suffice to say we have spent more than our fair share of time in hospital rooms, the ER and doctor’s offices.
Jaime has had kidney disease for quite a few years. Her nephrologist, Dr. Todd Gehr has done an excellent job in preparing us for the future – a kidney transplant.
In 2013 it became clear that her disease was advancing. We met with the transplant team in November. She is accruing time, but not yet active. That means that if a kidney match became available for her, she would not be able to accept it. We should have all of the necessary doctors visits completed in the next 2 months, so she will then be active on the list.
Dr. Gehr wanted to by-pass dialysis if possible. It became clear that was not an option either. We were preparing to have a fistula implanted so “if” she needed dialysis she would be ready. She became ready long before the fistula was implanted.
We have had a LOT of bumps in the road, but Jaime is doing much better right now. She is on dialysis three days a week. She finished her classroom work for her MA program. She is forging ahead with her career as if nothing has gotten in her way. Now she is waiting to be placed in a doctors office to complete her externship. Then state board tests and she will be a MA specializing in phlebotomy.
Our lives are bittersweet. I hate what my daughter is going through. Yet I am thankful for where we are in our lives and in our relationship.
We talk about the past a lot. Not to throw it in each others face, or to play the blame game, but to see how far we have come. She is beating her drug addiction. I am beating my co-dependency. We are beating our hurts, habits, and hang-ups. We make the best out of all situations and look forward to our days ahead.
So, all that to say this: I’m back and looking forward to talking with you on a regular basis! My goal was to have my book out by Jaime’s birthday in November. I could make that happen as far as the writing goes, but I made a choice to wait until February. I really want to build up my audience and introduce myself to more people.
So, if you know of any parent who has a child struggling with addiction, please send them my way. I would love to get to know them and help them survive & thrive through this time in their life.
What have you been up to these past 6 months? Have you realized there are less than 90 days to Christmas :)?